As the new school year approaches, children (and parents) often feel a mix of excitement and nervousness. These emotions are completely normal and usually stem from the uncertainty of starting something new. As a parent, you can support your child by validating their feelings, helping them feel prepared, and encouraging a confident, curious mindset. Here are practical tips to help ease the transition.

Understand Mixed Emotions

Your child may bounce between enthusiasm and worry, looking forward to seeing friends but feeling anxious about unknowns like their new teacher or academic workload. This emotional back-and-forth is common and natural. Excitement and anxiety both activate the nervous system, so butterflies and a racing heart can happen in either state. Let your child know it’s okay to have these mixed feelings.
Instead of brushing aside their concerns with phrases like, “You’ll be fine,” listen closely and validate their worries. Say things like, “Of course you’re excited to meet new people, but also nervous it might not happen.” Giving their feelings space reduces internal pressure and helps them feel understood.

Build Confidence with Realistic Optimism

Confidence doesn’t mean pretending everything will be easy, it means acknowledging what might be hard and reinforcing your child’s ability to handle it.

• Encourage them to take one step at a time and approach the school year like an explorer gathering information.
• Empathize with their fears and let them know you believe in their ability to adjust, make plans, or ask for help.
• After listening, offer to brainstorm strategies, if they’re ready.
• If they’re not, simply assure them you’re there for support.

Reduce Uncertainty by Creating Predictability

Uncertainty often drives anxiety. Reduce the unknowns by:

• Sharing any details you know about the school year; teachers, routines, or schedules.
• If possible, visit the school, drive by the drop-off area, or walk through a morning routine.
• Create visual calendars or checklists with important school details.
• Turn preparation into a game by comparing what’s the same versus what’s new this year.

This familiarity helps kids feel more grounded as they face changes.

Be an Anchor, Not a Mirror

When kids are anxious, it’s easy for parents to mirror that anxiety, or unintentionally project their own excitement. But too much emotional intensity, even well-intentioned, can feel overwhelming to a child. Instead, aim to be a steady anchor.
Pay attention to your own emotional responses and take cues from your child. Let them lead the conversation and respond with empathy and calm. Your regulated emotions set the tone and give your child the stability they need to process their own.

Final Thoughts

Back-to-school season is a time of change, growth, and opportunity. By recognizing and validating your child’s emotions, offering clear information, and approaching the transition with calm confidence, you’ll help them start the school year with resilience, and maybe even excitement. Your steady support is one of the most important back-to-school tools they have. 

Resource: Click here to download Dr. Dandas’ Back-to-School Adventures Kids Workbook.

Related Resources

Find Help | Anxiety and Depression Association of America, ADAA

Online Resources | Anxiety and Depression Association of America, ADAA

Support Groups | Anxiety and Depression Association of America, ADAA

Tips and Strategies to Manage Anxiety and Stress | Anxiety and Depression Association of America, ADAA

Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) | Anxiety and Depression Association of America, ADAA

Learn From Us | Anxiety and Depression Association of America, ADAA