Imagine you’re one half of the most successful partnership radio has ever seen, but the focus is mostly on your male counterpart and his outrageous antics.

That is Jackie ‘O’ Henderson’s lot in life.

For decades, she has played second banana to Kyle Sandilands, often undervalued for the contribution she makes to the winning dynamic between the two.

All that shifted on Friday when Sandilands called her out for being unprofessional and unfocused at work, chastising her for being too focused on astrology.

‘It’s affecting other things, like your fixation on this has made you almost unworkable. You’re off with the fairies with this s**t. It’s mental,’ Sandilands proclaimed to a shocked Henderson, who was on the verge of tears.

In any other workplace this would cause a major HR headache – but this is part of the magic that makes Kyle and Jackie O work. They air their dirty laundry in public.

The nine-minute audio clip has been posted on news websites and widely shared within media circles. Some have written it off as just another stunt, while others have expressed real concern for Henderson.

Let me put this to rest: this is not a stunt.

For decades, Jackie ‘O’ Henderson (pictured in October 2024) has played second banana to Kyle Sandilands, undervalued for the contribution she makes to the pair’s winning dynamic

It’s hardly a secret she has tried to carve out a career outside their controversial partnership – with varying degrees of success. (Henderson is pictured in Sydney in October last year)

This outburst hit a nerve with Henderson, who has always seen herself as the more professional of the two. She meets with producers during the day, spitballing ideas and organising segments, while Sandilands is only ‘on’ when the show is airing live.

‘I would never say things like that about you,’ a wounded Henderson said.

‘It’s a total attack, it really is… to say, “You don’t know what the eff is going on, you’re not doing your job.” That’s an attack and I wouldn’t do that.’

She has a point.

Although the show discusses all manner of things on air – including internal staff matters – this was one conversation Henderson believes should have been private.

She understands the power of connecting with listeners, and there’s no denying that their unfiltered, behind-the-curtain conversations have been a huge part of the show’s success over the years. But Sandilands’ actions on Friday went too far.

The insult was so cutting, so personal, that Henderson is now stepping away from her co-hosting role for ‘several days’.

The most likely outcome is that Henderson will come back, and they will make up on air. She has 100 million reasons to do so: the pair have a 10-year deal with ARN worth $200million.

The on-air falling-out between Sandilands and Henderson last Friday was not a publicity stunt

A few weeks ago, Henderson pulled out of Besties and Her Best Life – her two media ventures with her friend and manager Gemma O’Neill (left)

I was never entirely sure what Besties was supposed to be selling, but Gwyneth Paltrow was paid to speak at its inaugural live event, which must have cost them a small fortune 

And while Henderson has previously said she would walk away if she wasn’t happy, she’s also the kind of selfless person who wouldn’t leave her producers high and dry. 

But this particular argument is different to others they’ve had on the show. Sandilands has taken aim at her professionalism. And the question is whether she can forgive and forget.

There’s another underlying issue here. One that has often been whispered about within ARN and the media business more generally: Henderson’s identity crisis. 

You see, Henderson has been trying to grow her brand outside of her partnership with Sandilands for many years – with varying levels of success.

In 2022, she parted ways with her long-time manager Brad March – a respected radio pro and former CEO of Austereo – to join a new agency set up by her friend Gemma O’Neill (née Fordham). Gemma used to be the Hit Network’s national content director before flying solo, with BFF Jackie as her flagship client. 

The two launched a podcast together, Her Best Life – ‘for women who are ready to find their joy’ – which, as far as I can see, has only had moderate success.

It’s about as far from The Kyle and Jackie O Show as you could possibly imagine. No bawdy talk. No producers being pestered for details of their sex lives. 

Instead, you get shadow work, vision boards, therapy, tears, vaginal rejuvenation and, of course, ‘how to choose yourself every day’.

I’m sure there’s a market for that kind of Gen X, soft‑feminist, ‘find yourself’ content – but I doubt there is a significant overlap between that audience and KJO listeners

I’m sure there’s a market for that kind of content – but I doubt there is a significant overlap between that audience and KJO listeners.

Alongside Her Best Life, a lifestyle/events business was then launched to great fanfare, Besties, with the pair’s friendship as its linchpin.

I was never entirely sure what Besties was supposed to be selling, but at the heart of it was an image of Henderson as a girls’ girl. Honest. Relatable yet aspirational. Perhaps even a little Goop-y. Fittingly, Besties brought Gwyneth Paltrow to Australia for Besties’ inaugural live event, which must have cost them a small fortune.

A few weeks ago, Henderson pulled out of Besties and Her Best Life.

She explained ‘a big shift’ had happened leading up to the decision and – incredibly – implied that she ‘wanted to protect a fair bit of [her] private life’. 

(Excuse me? Hasn’t Henderson earned millions from her private life for decades? Or have I been in a fever dream since the early 2000s?) 

There’s no denying Henderson’s talent, but it’s equally true that – aside from her stint on The Masked Singer before its cancellation – she hasn’t managed to carve out sustained success beyond her partnership with Sandilands.

It’s hard not to imagine the frustration that comes with that.

And by stepping away from March and pivoting toward the Gen X, soft‑feminist, ‘find yourself’ market with O’Neill, she appeared to be making a calculated play for life after KJO – a direction that couldn’t be further from Kyle’s brand.

Given her quiet departure from Besties at the start of the year, it’s fair to infer that the venture hasn’t delivered the payoff she’d hoped for.

I suspect that last week’s on-air argument – a blow-up about astrology, of all things – was the culmination of years of unspoken tension over what the Jackie O brand is.

Is Henderson really just there to pull Sandilands into line? Or is she her own voice?

(As an aside, if her role is to rein in Kyle, I can’t say she has done a brilliant job. Sandilands often goes too far, which has undoubtedly hurt their show in Melbourne.)

I don’t doubt that Sandilands (pictured with his wife Tegan and son Otto) is privately stunned that things have escalated to this point

But I also understand her dilemma: while she tries to play the nice guy, she must know that the success of their show is down to the outrageous antics and stunts – often driven by Sandilands.

What I suspect has happened is this: Henderson started Besties in a bid to establish a brand-friendly, female-first image that was hers and only hers. When that diversion wasn’t as successful as she’d hoped, she began to quietly accept that her partnership with Sandilands is what she is, was and always will be most famous for.

Then, last week, being called unprofessional was a turning point. It cut deep.

She told Sandilands – a man she genuinely loves and respects, but whose broadcasting style has unquestionably boxed her in – that she would never speak to him on air the way he did on Friday. And she had a point.

They can fight, even get personal, but ultimately there is a line. For someone who prides herself on the work she puts into the show – and her work ethic has never been questioned before now – being told she has been up in the clouds was a huge blow.

Sandilands is the ultimate performer – he knows that drama makes for compelling listening, that controversy makes cash. He has always pushed the envelope and is now facing unprecedented restrictions from ACMA over past behaviour. He can deal with that, but losing his on-air partner, that’s another thing altogether.

Having spoken to Sandilands in the past, I’m sure he’ll have a moment of genuine introspection – a moment where he’s stunned that things have escalated to this point. There’s no question he was trying to make a serious point that had been simmering for weeks. But even he will be taken aback that Friday’s on‑air clash has resulted in Henderson stepping away from the show.

When a show succeeds, everyone wants credit – and Henderson, despite her obvious ambitions beyond the program, wants her role in building the powerhouse Kyle and Jackie O brand to be recognised. Being told that her own team believes she hasn’t been acting professionally was the line for her.

Everyone has a breaking point; this was hers.

The money will most likely bring them back together, but there is no doubt the relationship is forever changed. Sandilands has crossed a threshold with Henderson and things will never be the same again.