So. You did the thing. You brought home a puppy—an actual live wire wrapped in fur, teeth, and the world’s tiniest bladder. Congratulations (and condolences). Your floors? They’re doomed for a bit. Your heart? It’s toast.

Anyway—training. That’s the thing we think we’ll figure out later, but really, it starts yesterday. If you’re searching for how to train your puppy or frantically Googling puppy training tips at 3am while your new furry roommate chews through your sock drawer… yeah. Been there. Let’s talk.

Why Training Isn’t Just “Sit” and “Stay” (It’s… everything)

Listen—puppy training is more than commands. It’s like… imagine trying to teach an alien toddler how Earth works. That’s what we’re dealing with.

Training sets the tone. It’s structure. It’s boundaries. It’s the difference between a dog that listens when you scream “DROP IT” after they find a chicken bone on the sidewalk (ugh, ick, panic), and a dog that bolts into traffic because you never got around to recall.

And the bond? It gets deep. This isn’t some transactional obedience. It’s trust. It’s companionship. It’s—I don’t know—soul-level connection? I’m being dramatic, but also I’m not.

Step 1: Potty Training (AKA: The Endless Loop of Hope and Disappointment)

If you’ve stepped barefoot into something warm and squishy, you’re already familiar with the stakes here. Potty training is urgent, demoralizing, and oddly satisfying when it finally clicks.

• Routine. Same times, every day. First thing in the morning, right after meals, naps, playtime—before bed. Lather, rinse, repeat.
• Pick a potty zone. Outdoors. Same spot. Rain or shine (and oh, the rain? The puppy will always need to pee in the rain).
• Reward like it’s the lottery. Praise, treats, cheers, whatever. Be extra.
• Crates help. Gates too. Until they earn freedom, limit it.

And when accidents happen (they will)—clean, don’t punish. Puppies aren’t plotting against you (probably).

Step 2: Socialization—Yes, Your Puppy Needs a Social Life

You know those adults who were never socialized as kids and now act weird in elevators? Yeah, that’s what we’re avoiding here.

Socialization isn’t “take your puppy everywhere.” It’s slow, intentional exposure. Sounds, sights, smells (why do they love garbage?), textures underfoot. People in hats. Children yelling. Dogs with odd gaits. Wheelchairs. Skateboards. The vacuum cleaner.

Treat it like a video game—unlock new levels carefully.

• Positive experiences = happy, confident dog.
• Playdates? Sure. But only with healthy, vaccinated dogs.
• Treats galore. Every new thing should mean “YAY!” not “RUN!”

Honestly, if I could go back and re-do my last puppy’s socialization… I would. She barked at ceiling fans for 2 years. Not kidding.

Step 3: Basic Commands (Or: You Say “Sit,” They Stare Into Your Soul)

Okay—training your puppy to sit or come to you feels straightforward. Until you’re at the park, they see a squirrel, and suddenly they forget their own name.

Here’s how to actually teach the basics:

• Start with “sit.” Easiest. Hand over the head = butt goes down. Magic.
• “Come” is life-saving. Like, really. Nail this one.
• Short, happy sessions. Think: TED Talk attention span, not Netflix binge.
• Same words. Same tone. Every time. No “sit down now sweetie” one day and “HEY SIT” the next. Confusing.

Break it down. Praise the effort. Don’t expect perfection. (They’re babies. They barely understand gravity.)

Step 4: Be Kind or Go Cry in the Shower

Puppies mess up. A lot. They chew remotes. They pee mid-walk. They eat rocks (yes, rocks). You will be frustrated. You will yell (don’t). You will cry. Maybe both. But never—never—use fear to train.

Positive reinforcement means:

• Catch them doing right, not just wrong.
• Celebrate small wins.
• End on a good note. Always.

One time, my lab sat on command mid-poop. I gave her a chicken nugget out of sheer respect.

Step 5: Get Out of the House (Eventually)

Training at home? Great. But what happens when your dog hears a car alarm or sees a rogue balloon in the park? Real-world practice matters. But—timing. Wait till vaccinations are up to date.

• Vary environments. Kitchen, sidewalk, loud cafe, vet’s office, park.
• Gradual distractions. Don’t throw them into a kid’s birthday party unprepared.
• Same rules, new places. Keep it consistent.

Fun fact: My corgi nailed “stay” at home, then bolted into a fountain when I tried it at a mall courtyard. Lesson learned.

Random-but-Helpful Tips I Wish Someone Had Told Me

• Talk to your puppy like a cartoon character. They respond to happy tones.
• Don’t let “cute” bad habits slide—jumping up = adorable now, disaster later.
• Group puppy classes? Absolute gold. You get guidance, and your puppy gets social mileage.

Also: get a lint roller. Or seven. You’ll need one in your car, two by the door, and one in your soul.

Conclusion (aka: Yes, You’re Doing Enough)

Training your puppy won’t always feel magical. Sometimes it feels like yelling into the void while holding a treat pouch and wearing yesterday’s pajamas. But it works. Eventually. Mostly.

Celebrate every sit, every successful potty trip, every moment they don’t eat something unspeakable off the sidewalk. These are victories.

You’re not just raising a dog—you’re raising your best friend.

So breathe. Take breaks. Laugh when they do something ridiculous (because they will). You’ve got this.